Gibson Mhaka B-Metro
IN a pure act of mischief, a Bulawayo man who claimed that his wife had slapped him with sex sanctions caused a raucous in court when he begged the magistrate to halt proceedings and briefly allow him to have sex with his wife.
The “quickie”, he said, would subsequently stop him from self-pleasuring.
Nhlanhla Khumalo apparently justified his demands to turn the courtroom into a love nest saying at home his wife, Sithembisile Khumalo, had turned their 12-year relationship to that of a mere brother and sister.
In a bid to draw the magistrate’s mercy, Khumalo produced a yellow cloth which he said was never used despite the fact that he bought it from South Africa with the sole purpose of using it after intimacy.
Nhlanhla further claimed that if his wife continued sexually starving him he would resort to using mubobobo on her.
His claims came after his wife, who was seeking a protection order against him, had told the magistrate that he was in the habit of emotionally, physically and verbally abusing her.
“My husband is an excessive drinker and he turns violent against me every time he drinks. He physically, verbally and emotionally abuses me in front of our children. At one time he threatened to kill me,” said Sithembisile.
Responded Nhlanhla: “The problem is that my wife is denying me my conjugal rights. I get sex once in three weeks but I would want it every day. Today as I am speaking I didn’t get the morning glory. When I am deprived sexually I become angry leading to a misunderstanding.
“Your Worship I am going through hard times. Can you smell this cloth to ascertain whether it has been used? I bought it from South Africa with the sole purpose of using it . . . after the act but it is almost two months and it has not been used. I will be grateful if you give me an order to have sex here as a way of stopping me from m****bating because at home she refuses to sleep with me,” said Khumalo before he went all over his wife kissing and caressing her.